By Floyd Godfrey, PhD

Sexual addiction is a complex behavioral disorder characterized by compulsive engagement in sexual activity, often to the detriment of the individual's emotional, relational, and social well-being. Despite being less understood than substance addiction, sexual addiction shares similar criteria and underlying mechanisms, as noted by researchers Weiss and Schneider (2015). This article explores the characteristics of sexual addiction, its emotional underpinnings, and how it impacts individuals’ lives.

Defining Sexual Addiction
Sexual addiction follows patterns akin to other addictions, whether behavioral or substance-based. Weiss and Schneider (2015) outline its core criteria as “1. Ongoing obsession preoccupation with the drug/behavior of choice, 2. Loss of control over use (inability to stop), 3. Continuation despite directly related negative life consequences” (p. 10).

In practical terms, sexual addiction manifests as an overwhelming preoccupation with sexual thoughts or activities. Individuals may struggle to regulate their behavior, engaging in sexual acts compulsively despite knowing the harm it causes in their relationships, careers, or emotional health. This loss of control often fosters feelings of guilt and shame, further reinforcing the cycle of addiction.

The Emotional Numbing Mechanism
The driving force behind sexual addiction often lies in its role as an emotional escape. Healthy sexual behavior typically strengthens intimacy and fosters connection. Conversely, as Weiss and Schneider (2015) observe, “The main difference between healthy sex (or healthy eating) and addictive sex (or addictive eating) is that addicts engage in the behavior compulsively as a way to ‘emotionally numb out’ and ‘escape,’ and they continue to do so even as their clearly out-of-control behavior is creating significant problems in their lives” (p. 10).

Clients with sexual addiction often report using sexual activity to dissociate from distressing emotions, such as anxiety, depression, or unresolved trauma. The fleeting relief provided by these behaviors creates a dependency on sexual escapism, even as it leads to broader dysfunction. Common consequences include deteriorating relationships, workplace challenges, financial instability, and declining physical and emotional health.

Root Causes of Sexual Addiction
At its core, sexual addiction serves as a coping mechanism for unresolved emotional pain. Weiss and Schneider (2015) emphasize that “if a person is compulsively and persistently using sexual fantasy, sexual content, and sexual activity as a means of self-soothing or dissociating from stressful emotions or underlying psychological conditions (early-life trauma, depression, anxiety, attachment deficits, social deficits, or low self-esteem), that person is most likely a sex addict” (p. 10).

In my work with individuals struggling with sexual addiction, underlying factors such as childhood neglect, attachment difficulties, and low self-worth are recurring themes. These unresolved issues often create a vulnerability to addictive patterns, where sexual activity becomes an unhealthy substitute for emotional connection or stress management.

Recovery and Hope
While sexual addiction can feel overwhelming, recovery is achievable with the right support and strategies. Effective treatment often involves addressing underlying psychological wounds through therapy while establishing healthier coping mechanisms. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), trauma-informed care, and 12-step programs tailored to sexual addiction provide structured pathways to healing.

Education and open communication are also critical. Breaking the cycle of secrecy and shame allows individuals to confront their addiction with clarity and support. Loved ones and mental health professionals play vital roles in guiding individuals toward recovery and reclaiming a life of balance and connection.

Floyd Godfrey, PhD, is a Clinical Sexologist and a Certified Sex Addiction Specialist. He has been guiding clients since 2000 and currently speaks and provides consulting and mental health coaching across the globe. To learn more about Floyd Godfrey, PhD, please visit his website: www.FloydGodfrey.com.

References
Weiss, R., & Schneider, J. P. (2015). Always Turned On: Sex Addiction in the Digital Age. Gentle Path Press.