By Floyd Godfrey, PhD

Understanding the Clinical Reality
Within the evolving cultural conversation, a persistent myth suggests that counseling for unwanted sexual attraction or confusion is inherently harmful. Yet in clinical practice, a different pattern consistently emerges. Many individuals seek therapy not to be coerced into change, but to better understand the emotional and psychological roots of their experiences. Over decades of clinical work, it has become evident that directly targeting sexual attraction as the primary goal of therapy often yields limited and unsustainable results. Instead, meaningful progress tends to occur when therapy focuses on the underlying emotional issues that contributed to the development of same-sex attraction or confusion.

Research Supporting Clinical Experience
Recent findings by Sullins (2026) strongly align with this clinical observation. The study reports, “Both men and women strongly reduced same-sex attraction and behavior and increased opposite-sex attraction and behavior, with statistically significant effect sizes ranging from moderate to very large,” (p. 8). While this demonstrates that change can occur, the more significant insight lies in how such outcomes are achieved.

Sullins (2026) further explains, “Surprisingly, the most helpful type of therapy for an SSA shift was not any of the targeted change therapies or non-change-oriented therapy for sexuality struggles, but therapy that addressed psychological issues not necessarily or directly related to sexuality, such as depression, anxiety, or substance abuse,” (p. 16). This directly confirms what many clinicians have observed in practice. When therapy moves away from attempting to directly modify attraction and instead addresses core emotional struggles, clients often experience deeper and more sustainable transformation.

The Role of Underlying Emotional Drivers
The development of sexual attraction patterns do not happen in isolation. They are often influenced by early attachment experiences, trauma, emotional neglect, or unmet relational needs. In the field of sexual addiction recovery, professionals such as Patrick Carnes have emphasized that compulsive or confusing sexual behaviors frequently function as coping mechanisms for unresolved emotional pain.

When therapy focuses narrowly on changing attraction, it risks overlooking these foundational issues. This approach can lead to frustration, shame, or a sense of failure when change does not occur as expected. In contrast, addressing anxiety, depression, trauma, or relational wounds allows clients to experience healing at a deeper level. As these underlying issues are resolved, shifts in behavior, identity clarity, and even attraction may naturally follow.

Effective Therapeutic Strategies
A more effective therapeutic model prioritizes holistic care. This includes exploring attachment history, identifying emotional triggers, and developing healthier coping strategies. Cognitive and behavioral interventions can help clients reframe distorted beliefs, while trauma-informed approaches facilitate emotional processing and integration.

Additionally, structured recovery programs for compulsive sexual behaviors provide accountability and support. These programs often incorporate mindfulness, relational repair, and values-based decision-making. By focusing on the whole person rather than a single aspect of identity, therapy becomes a process of growth rather than correction.

Education also plays a key role. Helping clients understand the interplay between neurobiology, environment, and emotional experience can reduce shame and increase motivation for change. When individuals feel understood and supported, they are more likely to engage meaningfully in the therapeutic process.

A More Balanced and Hopeful Perspective
The assumption that counseling is harmful for individuals experiencing unwanted sexual attraction or confusion fails to reflect both research and clinical reality. Evidence from Sullins (2026) confirms that therapy can be beneficial, particularly when it addresses broader psychological concerns rather than focusing exclusively on attraction.

For mental health professionals, this reinforces a critical principle, sustainable change emerges from addressing root causes. By prioritizing emotional healing, ethical care, and individualized treatment, clinicians can provide meaningful support to those seeking clarity and relief.

Clients deserve a therapeutic environment that respects their goals while guiding them toward deeper self-understanding and wellbeing. When therapy is approached in this way, it becomes not only effective but transformative.

Floyd Godfrey, PhD is a Clinical Sexologist and a Certified Sex Addiction Specialist. He has been guiding clients since 2000 and currently speaks and provides consulting and mental health coaching across the globe. To learn more about Floyd Godfrey, PhD please visit his website: www.FloydGodfrey.com

References
Sullins, D. P. (2026). Sex differences in reported effectiveness and psychosocial effects of therapy-assisted sexual orientation change. Cureus. https://doi.org/10.7759/cureus.104735