By Floyd Godfrey, PhD

The role of a father as a mentor and model for his son is pivotal in shaping his identity and character. Fathers are uniquely positioned to guide their sons through life’s complexities, equipping them with the values and wisdom needed to thrive. As O’Donnell (2011) observes, “Much of what’s involved in giving our sons what they need comes down to telling them what we think and feel” (p. 31). Effective fatherhood combines action and communication, ensuring sons not only see what to do but also understand why it matters.

Modeling Faith and Integrity

A father’s life serves as a living example of values and beliefs. O’Donnell emphasizes, “Our sons do not only need to see us living lives that are worth imitating, they also need to hear why we do it – the values and beliefs that guide our actions and shape our words” (2011, p. 31). This dual responsibility underscores the importance of aligning actions with words.

The Bible offers guidance for this calling: “Be imitators of me, as I am of Christ” (1 Corinthians 11:1, ESV). Fathers are to reflect Christ’s example in their actions, demonstrating integrity, humility, and faith. By living authentically and sharing the motivations behind their choices, fathers instill a moral compass in their sons.

Communicating Heritage and Values

Children crave understanding of their heritage and the principles that define their families. O’Donnell highlights, “Children can’t read our minds. They want to know something about their moral, religious, and cultural heritage from us” (2011, p. 31). Fathers must intentionally communicate the lessons of their faith, family traditions, and cultural values, passing on a legacy that helps sons navigate the world with clarity and confidence.

Deuteronomy 6:6-7 advises, “These words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children” (ESV). Fathers fulfill this biblical mandate by creating moments of connection, whether through prayer, shared stories, or thoughtful discussions about life’s deeper questions.

Mentorship: Teaching How and Why

Fatherhood is a form of lifelong mentorship. According to O’Donnell, “As mentors, as teachers-for-life, we become for our sons a reference point not only for how things are done, but why they are done” (2011, p. 31). This mentorship encompasses practical skills and moral reasoning, helping sons understand the interplay between faith and daily life.

Moreover, mentorship requires humility and dialogue. As O’Donnell notes, “Our power as fathers comes from practicing what we preach (and from discussing instead of preaching)” (2011, p. 31). A father’s openness fosters trust, allowing sons to explore ideas and develop their own convictions under their father’s guidance.

The Legacy of Fatherhood

Fathers who mentor with purpose leave an indelible mark on their sons. By living authentically, communicating clearly, and mentoring with love, fathers prepare their sons to embrace life with integrity and faith. Through their actions and words, fathers model a Christ-centered life that inspires their sons to follow in their footsteps, empowered by the wisdom and values they have received.

Floyd Godfrey, PhD, is a Board Certified Christian Counselor and has facilitated groups within different churches and denominations over the past 30 years. He worked as a licensed clinician for 23 years and provided supervision and training for other counselors as they worked toward independent licensure. You can read more about Floyd Godfrey, PhD at www.FloydGodfrey.com.

References
O’Donnell, M. A. (2011). What a Son Needs From His Dad - How a Man Prepares His Sons For Life. Bethany House.