Floyd Godfrey, PhD

Articles

A Christian Perspective on Discussing Sex and Pornography with Your Teens

By Floyd Godfrey

 

In a world where the tide of information is unceasing and the waves of societal change constantly crash upon the shores of our homes, Christian parents find themselves navigating through the challenging waters of adolescence with their teens. The topics of sex and pornography, once taboo or whispered about in hushed tones, are now prevalent, confronting our youth at every turn. It is crucial, now more than ever, for parents to open honest, informed, and compassionate dialogues with their teenagers about these sensitive subjects.

Starting the Conversation

Initiating a conversation about sex and pornography with your teen can seem daunting. Yet, it's important to approach these discussions from a place of love, understanding, and biblical wisdom. Begin by setting a foundation of trust and openness in your relationship, ensuring your teen feels safe to share their thoughts and questions without fear of judgment or condemnation.

Addressing the False Messages of Pornography

Pornography presents a distorted and unrealistic portrayal of sex, relationships, and human dignity. It's vital to discuss the false messages that pornography propagates, such as the objectification of individuals, the unrealistic standards of beauty and performance, and the detrimental effects it can have on relationships and self-image. Emphasize that these portrayals do not align with God's design for sex and intimacy, which is rooted in love, respect, and commitment within the sanctity of marriage.

Guiding Teens with Biblical Principles

Incorporating biblical principles into the conversation provides a solid, moral framework for your teen to understand God's intentions for sex. One verse that encapsulates this is 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 (NIV): "Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies."

This passage encourages us to view our bodies as sacred, deserving of respect and care, and reminds us that our actions, including sexual ones, should honor God. Discussing such scriptures with your teen can help them understand the spiritual implications of their choices and reinforce the importance of preserving their purity and integrity.

Practical Ideas for Talking to Teens

  • Scheduled Discussions and Open-Door Policy: Set aside regular times for family discussions on various topics, including sex and pornography, ensuring your teen knows they can come to you with questions or concerns at any time.
  • Use Teachable Moments: Everyday situations, media, and news stories can provide natural opportunities to discuss these issues, allowing you to impart wisdom in real-time.
  • Educate Yourself and Your Teen: Use resources designed for Christian families to educate both yourself and your teen on these topics, providing them with accurate information and godly perspectives.

Conclusion: A Message of Hope and Encouragement

As you embark on these conversations, remember, you are not navigating these waters alone. God's wisdom and strength are always available to guide you. Proverbs 22:6 (NIV) encourages us, "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." Your efforts to discuss sex and pornography openly and from a Christian perspective lay a foundation of trust, respect, and moral integrity in your teen's life.

Though these conversations may be challenging, they are also an opportunity to strengthen your relationship with your teen and guide them toward making wise, God-honoring decisions. Take heart in knowing that your willingness to address these topics candidly can equip your teen with the knowledge and moral fortitude to navigate the complexities of adolescence and beyond.

May your conversations be filled with grace, truth, and love, reflecting the heart of Christ to your children. As you guide them through these turbulent waters, may you find peace in the promise that God is with you, providing wisdom, strength, and hope every step of the way.

Floyd Godfrey is a clinical sexologist and provides consulting and mental health coaching. To learn more about his services go to his website: www.FloydGodfrey.com

 

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